No Wonder We All Have ADHD.

Randomly, in this high-powered position I hold... it is imperitive for me to have constant updates on whether or not the National Service Learning foundations are suddenly freeing up nonexistent government funds for non-profits.

Thus, I must get a RSS feed.

Have you ever heard of this? I like to think I'm tech savvy. I ROFL when my BFFs send me jokes. (Thanks to a NYT article, I've updated my list) Plus, the kids that come on our programs keep me up to date on "coolness" factors: ie- "She's so uncool....she's still got a landline."

But, seriously, a ticker at the bottom of my screen telling me every hour that the NSLC has NOT infact received money to fund more service learning programs in the Tri-State area?

I figured it would be a simple little button in the bottom of my screen that would pop up when the site downloaded. No problemo. So I try to download this RSS program. Three sites later, I finally get the program downloaded. Yes, ENTIRE PROGRAM.

It's Outlook for the ADHD web addict. In two seconds (faster than my own outlook can receive a message) I have 1034 breaking news stories, 765 updated pages and this ticker is telling me about local news for a small town outside of Mumbai.

Is this what the world is coming to? I just want to know when the government will release funds for my non-profit. When Counting Crows will play in NYC. When Broadway tickets are free.

I don't need to know that liver disease is preventable in rats with artificial human liver particles.

So, in the midst of doing the daily grind, I am fighting with this stupid program with pop-ups and tickers and flashing alerts telling me about tooth loss predicting faster aging and children in Scotland finding a woman's head. (Oddly, they continue to mention that the kids were playing soccer...in Scotland, this would be futbol.)

So my mind is on futbol heads, rats and the length of my life in relation to the teeth that might fall out due to my lack of dental insurance INSTEAD on whether or not the government will free up money for my non-profit.

I thought this feed was designed to help my day. Not throw me into this informed tangent of life where I want to update my monster.com profile to reflect possible dental needs. In the week of my finals during two semesters of college (seperate times, same computer issues) I was without internet. Thus receiving spectacular grades because I did not spend 2 hours a night checking my myspace, facebook and livejournal. Nor did I need to see what Britney Spears was up to. After this, I decided that Sundays were forever going to be no cell phone days. Try contacting me on a Sunday. You think its tough to get me on Tuesday? Sunday will be nigh impossible. All because cutting yourself off from instant access tends to produce greater results. And more sanity.

So, as I sit on the subway next to the guy with his Blackberry heading to his hipster pad where we all have internet and myspace pages for buildings like McKibben Lofts, I wonder, how does a writer get away from it all- when so much fodder lies within the thick of it?